Have you ever felt like you’re just waiting for someone to tap you on the shoulder and say, “Hey, you don’t have what it takes to be in this role!” ?
Despite everything you’ve accomplished, that little voice between your ears might still whisper, “You’re not good enough,” or “Sooner or later, everyone’s going to figure out you don’t really know what you’re doing.”
I’m waving my hand wildly in the air right now.
Welcome to imposter syndrome—a feeling many of us know all too well. But here’s the thing: those thoughts are just stories your brain is telling you, and with a little insight and a few brain hacks, you can start to rewrite them.
Why Imposter Syndrome Happens: Blame It on the Brain
Imposter syndrome isn’t about lacking skills or qualifications; it’s all in how your brain reacts to stepping outside of your comfort zone. Your brain is hardwired to protect you, and sometimes that means sounding an alarm when you try something new or take on a challenge like a new leadership position or starting a new business.
This is where your amygdala—what I like to call the brain’s alarm—comes into play. It senses uncertainty and says, “Hey, are you sure you can do this?” At the same time, the prefrontal cortex—the part of your brain responsible for logic and decision-making—can get overwhelmed, making you feel stalled out or causing you to overanalyze and second-guess yourself.
Neuroscience Fact: Research shows that when we experience imposter syndrome, there’s increased activity in the prefrontal cortex during self-reflection, causing us to fixate on our perceived shortcomings instead of seeing our strengths and options.
My Own Journey with Imposter Syndrome
When I first started my coaching practice in 2005, I often caught myself thinking, “Who am I to help others when I haven’t fully figured out my own stuff?” That thought followed me around for the first year, making me feel like I constantly had to prove my value.
And if I didn’t feel I was bringing value to my coaching sessions, imposter syndrome would set in and my inner critic would come out screaming…
“You don’t have what it takes.”
“You suck as a coach and you should quit.”
“You’re a fraud.”
Ouch!
Thank goodness for my journaling practice. I leaned in heavy and hard to work through those nasty thoughts and feelings.
Through journaling, I began to realize that my struggle wasn’t about lacking ability or skills—it was rooted in the feeling that I had to prove myself with a side order of good old fear. (Enter mind-blowing awareness.) Couple that awareness with something a mentor once said to me and my perception completely shifted. By the way, in case you're curious as to what she said that made a difference, here it is …
”Pam, people don’t care about the trainings you have gone through or the letters behind your name. What people care about are the fires that you’ve walked through that are going to help them walk through their own.”
I came to the realization that it wasn’t about having everything figured out. In fact, it was about being open and transparent with my clients - showing up as my authentic self.
Once I embraced that understanding, I noticed a shift in both myself and the people I worked with. But that change didn’t happen overnight—it took conscious effort and trying different tools to reshape my mindset.
So, if you’re feeling the weight of imposter syndrome, here are some experiments you can try to start rewiring your brain and boosting your confidence.
Experiment #1: Reality Check Your Brain
Pause and Breathe: Slow, deep breaths can calm your brain’s alarm system, reducing the intensity of the fear response triggered by the amygdala.
List Your Wins: Write down three recent accomplishments where you handled something successfully. Focusing on these wins activates your brain’s reward system, releasing dopamine—a chemical that reinforces positive feelings about your abilities.
Challenge the Fear: Ask yourself, “What’s the worst that could happen?” Like bacteria shrinks and dies when it’s exposed to the light, shining a light on your fears helps them lose their power. This also helps your prefrontal cortex regain control and put your worries into perspective.
Experiment #2: Get Curious About Your Doubts
Instead of running from imposter syndrome, lean into it with curiosity.
Shift Your Perspective: When self-doubt pops up, ask yourself, “Isn’t it interesting that my brain is telling me this?” By doing this, you activate the part of your brain that helps with problem-solving and flexible thinking.
Track Your Doubts: For one week, jot down when imposter syndrome shows up. What triggered it? How did it make you feel? By the end of the week, you’ll likely notice patterns. Understanding these triggers can help you be more prepared the next time self-doubt strikes.
Experiment #3: Give Your Inner Critic a Name
A lighthearted way to distance yourself from imposter syndrome is to give your inner critic a name. I call mine Bitty B because she’s feisty.
Name It: Call that inner critic something fun, like “Doubting Debbie” or “Nervous Ned.” Research shows that externalizing and labeling your negative thoughts can help separate them from your sense of self.
Respond with Humor: The next time “Doubting Debbie” shows up, acknowledge her: “Oh, there’s Debbie again, up to her usual tricks! Thanks for sharing, but I’ve got this!” By responding playfully, you engage the logical part of your brain, helping you manage the emotional reactivity.
Challenge: Pick one of these experiments and give it a try the next time imposter syndrome creeps in. Reflect on how it made you feel and what worked for you. You might just be surprised at how powerful these small shifts can be.
Final Thoughts
While imposter syndrome may be common, it doesn’t have to derail you. By understanding how your brain works and trying some simple, science-backed tools, you can quiet that inner critic so you can engage with your mad skills and abilities.
Because at the end of the day, you deserve to feel confident in your place and your abilities.
Comments